On Boys and Babies

Well, here I am about to admit something to the whole world that I cannot quite admit to myself. Therefore, I will attempt to do this locigally and as free the emotion that I am currently feeling as I can.

First order of business - babies. I have maintained a for a while that babies are non-human. They are just these alien-like things that come out of a woman's body. Luckily, not through their chest. These babliens smell, they cry, they get fussy, and they keep you up at night and cause arguments about who will change the dirty diaper. They come with amajor financial set back and some ritual called a "baby shower" where the mother gets pink things if the baby is a girl and blue things if it is a boy. And then somewhere along the line, they grow and change into real people. That process requires lots of yelling at the kids while trying to teach them how to become true humans. However, there was a time when I held babies and cared for them, but I grew out of that. And now, for some wierd reason, I look at pictures of my niece and can't help but feel love for this little girl. I think howcute she looks, and sometimes even the "awh" sigh comes out, I just hope that no one hears me. So deep down I love kids and want some of my own someday, but I will still be as removed and unemotional as I can. It is hard, I have the anatomy of a female and a very cute niece. We will just see how it goes.

Number two on the list -guy-girl relationships. I have a very good friend that I love to hang out with and talk with. He is a gentleman in every sense of the word, and as he has told me, I am very self sufficient girl. He never fails to open the car door for me and he will help me across the ice so that I don't fall. He opens doors for me (unless I open them first) and always makes sure that I am comfortable. I flew in to Denver on saturday and I had no idea how heavy my suitcase was until I pulled if off the baggage carousel at DIA. I never would have thought that I would appreciate these actions as much as I do. He does things for me that I could easily do for myself. I have just been used to doing these things myself for so long that I do forget that he likes to do those things for me. Plus I am not going to be one of those girls that requires that, that just seems to girly and cheesy. I am not above asking for help from men, especially when the trash needs to be taken out or I need to get something off the top shelf. So, in conclusion, even though I can get along just fine by myself, it certainly feels good to have someone do them for you because they want to.

Okay, now that I got that over with, I will stop and continue on my merry way. No more talk of cute babies or extremely nice things that mean more on the inside than the outside. I am going to go back being my aloof and unemotional self. Crying because you are happy is unacceptable and crying because you are sad is a form of weekness. But believe me, I have my weeknesses. Have a very Merry Christmas and enjoy spending time with your family.

Christmas Thoughts

So I find myself home on Christmas Eve, just the place I want to be. However, this Christmas feels a little different. The holiday season has felt different for the past two years simply because I come from college (an independent environment) to a place where people care when you are going to be home. This and the fact that you are now a guest in the home you grew up in, makes for some different feelings. However, this year feels even more different. My younger sister now has her driver's license and boy problems. Two things that I am completely unequipt to deal with. Also, my uncle is coming with his 8,000 children. Don't get me wrong, I am happy and excited for them to come, I have just become so removed from children to past few years to the part that they almost scare me (not kidding!!).
Yet, there are still more differences this year that deal mostly with me. This year, I find myself wishing and hoping that certain people will like their gifts. Almost to the point where I get frustrated and angry because everything has to be perfect for them. This is a completely new experience for me. I know, deep down (somewhere) that they will enjoy what ever I get for them, or even just the time I spend with them, but still, it has to be perfect. I lay up at night searching my mind for just the perfect gift. Luckily these people are not immediate family and so, I will not be feeling their wrath come Christmas Day - that shall come later.

Finalling

This is the time of year where I go crazy. Hopefully I will survive and update this if I am not dead or a vegetable in two weeks.

Guys and Girls

Okay, this is never happening again. I never post two times in one day, much less two times in one month. However, my motivation has hit a new low. I am currently about 5000 feet above sea level and my motivation is on the bottom of the Dead Sea.

My friend and I were talking last night about how sensitive we want guys to be. Sure it would be wonderful and great to have the guy notice a the new haircut, the new shoes, or even when you are a little down. However, too much would just get too annoying. I need my guy to be guy through and through. He notices when I look cute and pretty, but I could care less if he noticed that I cut one inch off my hair. Of course, on my head, I would have to cut off about six inches for anyone (including females) to notice. I want my guy to watch sports and yell at the screen on occasion. I want him to have some knowledge about cars and to be able to work hard in the yard (with or without a shirt on!). I want him to be athletic and love to get out there and sweat, especially with me (I am only talking sports!). He needs to appreciate a good workout and yet still know how to clean up nicely. He needs to be nice and considerate and hopefully know how to cook because I fail in that area. I want him to notice me and to want to be around me, but still likes to go hang out with the guys. He can even play Halo on occasion, as long as he lets me play even though I suck at it.

Wow, I did not know that I had that many requirements for a guy. These are not actually requirements, so rest easy my future mate. My whole thing is that I want the guy to love me and notice me, but to still be all man. Some women may want sensitive guys, but I understand that guys and girls are wired differently, so when I want a guy I go to him, and when I want a girl I go to my sister or a friend. Too much estrogen is something that is too easy to come by I am afraid and so, therefore, I want a man.

Girls are mean, they have too many pet peeves, and they hold grudges. Girls expect others to always think of them and to do nice things for them. They don't understand that their boyfriend may want to have some alone time or hang out with the guys. Girls want everything to go their way and they talk and over analyze everything. Girls love talking about guys, guys they hate, guys they like, guys that they use for favors, guys that they don't like but don't want other girls to date. Girls want things done when they want them done and things done they way they want them to be done. Girls are also caring and sensitive and notice your shoes and your new haircut. Don't get me wrong, I don't hate girls, after all, I am one of them. I am just saying that sometimes it is nice to get a break and to hang out with the guys.

Guys communicate with grunts (or Wookie-speak) and they are interested when BYU brings in a different (terrible) quarterback. They won't listen when football is on and they don't really care who is around at any specific time. Unless, of course, the girl or guy is really annoying and they can't stand it anymore. Oh and guys eat, a lot. I made the mistake of leaving ice cream in my friends apartment and three guys consumed almost a half gallon of ice cream. They love food and don't complain about their weight - they do something about it. Guys can also give good advice. It is nice to see there perspective on things (especially when other guys are the topic of the conversation). Also, guys take out the trash.

All in all, guys and girls are a good mix. Too much of one can get annoying. I enjoy all my friends, male and female.

Are You Engaged Yet?

My wonderful mother and I had a long conversation last night. The only subject touched on was boys and my current dating status. Nothing about school, nothing about my family, friends or roommates, and nothing about my tennis game. She only wanted to know if I was close at all to getting hitched, which for the record is no. What is it about mothers that just want their daughters to get married? I understand the father's point of view - one less person to pay for, no longer having to deal with her shopping habits (which my are small compared to most, and I am easy to shop for. Anything works as long as it is pink). Not having to deal with another PMS-ing woman in the house or a flat tire or trying to convince the female that the oil does need to be changed every now and then (why, exactly?). Though, I also seem to think that some fathers are sad to see their girls go, though most won't admit it. Before, Dad used to be the one male they would go to if their upper-body strength was lacking or if they needed un-female advice (which can be a VERY good thing), but once she gets wed, Dad is not the number one man anymore. Of course, this is supposed to happen, but I imagine that it could be hard. Also, there is always the fear that the "perfect" man may not be so perfect and heartbreak (or possibly broken arms) could be in the future. However, even though the father may feel these things, I think he would be the last one to admit it.

Mothers, on the other hand just want their kids to be close. This is precisely why I am going to live someplace cold so that my beach-addicted mother will only visit on occasion (just kidding, she is not REALLY addicted to beaches!). A mother wants her kids to be happy, but happy with the man that she picks out and happy living and raising her grandchildren like she wants them to be raised. It must be hard to boss your kids around for their whole life and then suddenly, bam!, your advice is only wanted when needed. I really think that mothers are more attached to their children then fathers. This is due to the whole thing that men and women are wired differently. Mothers still wish to be a main figure of importance in their children's lives, and it is difficult for them to grow apart. This has to happen, but mothers don't worry. Children still value your opinion and will still come to you when a recipe goes terribly wrong, or they spill wine on their white table cloth.

All in all, every party involved in the whole marriage thing was advance warning. Unless the child elopes, there is meeting the in-laws and careful planning of a wedding (with the mother doing the most work, of course). So this separation of parent and child does not come as a surprise, but it may still be a sad day. One may say that it is a very happy day, which, of course, it is, but once you realize that their questions will be directed to their spouse and not you, you may get teary eyed for a minute, but then realize that you have three children still at home to terrorize.

I would like to end this post saying that I am very grateful for my parents. They put up with me and still give me advice without my asking. They are kind and caring and want me to succeed in life, not just in marriage. Oh, and for the record, after the terrorizing, homemade chocolate chip cookies were given out to the child with the most fear. So, I love you Mom and Dad (and step-mom and -dad) and keep up the good work. And remember, there are still more after me, so just because you may fail to marry me off, I am sure you will succeed with the younger ones. :)

Procrasti-Nation (The Student Union Building)

Okay, here I am supposed to be writing my paper on the photoelectric effect, and what am I doing? Procrastinating!! Last night, I will a little down, so obviously, no school work got done. I did see a pretty cool action flick, IRobot. It was fun, my favorite parts were when Will Smith was shirtless. Oh, and the special effects were pretty cool too, I guess.

So, after my homeworkless night, I wake up this morning with every intention of getting my paper done. I make it up to the library before ten o-clock where I promptly check my email and facebook and lookup cheesecake recipes. The cheesecake is for a friend, and I am confused because I don't even like cheesecake, yet I know that I will eventually bake one. After spending about thirty minutes on the internet, I leave the library and head over to browse the bookstore. I try on shoes, do everything within my power to not buy a pink BYU blanket or sweatshirt, and ultimately end up buying BYU chapstick. That made me feel better especially after I noticed that it said, "Feel the Love." What love, do you ask? Well evidently not the love of BYU because on top of that paper and that math take-home test due Monday, I have three homework assignments due Tuesday. But, I can't rest because I have a Philosophy paper due the Monday after Thanksgiving as well as extra credit for Physics. Where did my Thanksgiving break go? Well, it went to my friend Mary, who started her vacation the Friday before Thanksgiving.

Okay, back to my original procrastination. After buying my chapstick, I go up to the computer store and look for a pink flash drive. It does not matter that I already have a perfectly good flash drive, it is just that a pink one would be nice. Unfortunately, they were all out of pink (well I am assuming, because who would not want a pink flash drive?). It is then that I notice the pink iPod covers. Again, it does not matter that I already have a pink iPod cover, mine was just a little dirty is all. So I buy it and put it on, and boy I am happy so now, I am going to work on my paper!! I got as far as the bowling alley in the Wilk. I have not picked up a bowling ball in a while so I buy three games and bowl with all the middle aged men. My scores were not too bad, 122-132, considering I have not bowled in months. That was fun to throw 10-lb balls around and it was a stress relief.

So, now you are thinking that after that, that I am now ready to work on my paper. Well, that is what I thought too, and we would both be wrong. I tried to do my test, but then the football game was on, and the open-access lab was too close to the table where I was sitting. So, the moral of the story is, stop at the chapstick and do your work. It needs to get done however boring it may be. Suffer now through school where you can enjoy the rest of your life. Also, don't ever get on the internet when you know that there are temptations. Facebook, why are you there when your only purpose is to aid in procrastinating? As much as I hate Facebook, my account will still be there tomorrow, updated as usual.

A Romantic, What?

So it has been quite a while since I have updated. And quite frankly, nothing much has changed. BYU is still the same with the purpose still dating. The other day my home teacher asks, "Who was that guy I saw you talking to on campus?" My reply included, a friend, he has a girlfriend, to which the subject was dropped quickly. No sense in talking about him if he has a girlfriend, right?

Well, I might as well go out and admit something. All my life I have said that dating is stupid and that marriage has a point, just later in life. I have also maintained that swooning over a guy is retarded and that simply enjoy a guy's company is just the same as your roommate's. I express these thoughts to hide the real me. The romantic. It would be nice to have someone around that is going to be there and that you can count on being your friend. Simply just sitting next to him or holding his hand is nice and it is a sad day when that is taken away. Also for the whole marriage thing, as young and naive as I may be, it would be great if I were to wake up every morning and know that the person beside me loves me fully and I love him. It would be nice to just have one person that you can count on always to be there and to love you back.

Okay, now that I have realized what I have done, I will go back to being my normal self. The un-romantic girl that does not like babies. Or children for that matter (odd, since I want kids someday of my own). Flirting is fun and I can do it without any consequences because no guy will get the wrong impression cause he won't like me back. (PS If my eternal companion is somehow reading this [unlikely], please refer to the paragraph above). Therefore, I will have fun while I can, until the shackles of marriage get to me. Just a reminder - the paragraph above are my true thoughts, these are just my guards so that I won't ever get hurt. And the right one will come as a surprise, a very, very good surprise. These guards have worked for me thus far and they have not turned traitor. This is due largely to the fact that they get great benefits (optical, oral, and even sports-medicine!).

I write this not to admit that I am jealous of those in a true relationship (dating or marriage), or to make fun of them. I am just finally admitting that it is hard to be a single woman in the largest dating factory in the world. Again, I know that I am only twenty, but I figured I might as well admit the facts.

Disclaimer: If this somehow becomes known around the world, I will have to hurt anyone that spreads it. Granted, I did admit myself over the internet, but the purpose was not to vent or to be made fun of (though I am okay with that).

The Freshman Reunion

I am currently taking a first-year writing class at BYU and it has finally dawned on me that I am terrible at writing. So just wanted to say thank you to those who read this and stick it out to the end. I do have fun posting.

Last weekend, I attended a reunion with the girls from my Freshman ward. The main topic of discussion was the massive amounts of weddings and engagements that have happened in the past two years. Those that are married love to talk about their husbands and the married life. To that I say, enjoy being single while you can. Why be tied down to one guy so early in your life? Have fun because once you are married, your knight-in-shining armour will soon be middle-aged with a belly. Not too soon I hope. Then there were those conversations with the engaged people. Wedding plans were discussed as well as the all-important first date. To a single girl, this says, "Watch out while on dates, he could soon become your eternal companion." What I would really like to hear, however is, "The engagement just jumps up and bites you in the butt, don't worry about anything, it is only the most life-changing decision you will ever make." And finally, we single girls liked to stick together. I heard excuses such as, school is too time consuming, I want to serve a mission, or my favorite, "the right guy just hasn't come around." Of course, after the dating status was taken care of, the topic of conversation became about life. Questions like, "How is life?", "What is your major again?" and "Do you still play tennis?" were thrown around but only given half a thought. Face it, the whole purpose of the reunion was to establish who was married and who wasn't. At least I got a free breakfast out of it. Actually, I did enjoy the reunion, it was nice to see those that I haven't seen in a long time and to go back to the disaster that was my freshman year.

Okay, now I would like to compare the female freshman year reunion to the male freshman year reunion. As I exhibit all the qualities of a female, I only make guess on behalf of the males. This is what I feel the reunion would go like:
Talking about the mission. This will take up most of the time because most of them would be fresh off their missions when the reunion actually happens. This is normal, nothing wrong with mission talk.
Reliving stupid pranks/special events from freshman year. This would include stealing someones clothes while in the shower, jumping out a window, stealing the microwave, sliding down stairs on a mattress, the gallon challenge, and being idiots. I think we are all in agreement that freshman boys do exhibit very unsophisticated talents.
Playing sports and/or video games. I understand the fascination with getting together and throwing the football or playing ultimate Frisbee, I myself enjoy those activities, but video games? Why sit in front of a television/computer screen for hours on end shooting at aliens or trying to make the little pixel-ated ball into the goal. This accomplishes nothing except, of course, better gaming skills. I will admit that recently I watched two teams playing Halo and teamwork and communication was required, but in the end, they went back to grunt-communicating males.
The last topic to come up would be the dating life. If anyone was married or engaged, a "congrats" would be shouted and then the refreshments made up of Doritos and Root Beer would be quickly devoured.

It's the BYU Way of Life

Here is another glimpse into the BYU way of life. For those of you unfamiliar with the BYU lifestyle, do not be afraid. These concepts may be hard to accept at first, but once you understand them, you will learn to pity us. To assist you, I will first outline a few examples and explain the key components and their importance.

Example 1:
This is a conversation I overheard on the way to class today. It involves a male and a female and I got the idea that they had not seen each other in a while.
Male: Hey, how are you doing?
Female: Great! So, are you married yet?
Male: No, are you kidding me?
Female: Why not, what's wrong with you?

Explanation: This conversation includes the main topic of every discussion over heard on BYU campus. It gets the mundane details over with quickly (really caring about how the person is doing) and gets straight to the point of marriage. The guy, either doesn't want to get married or has not yet found the perfect girl. To the female, however, the real reason that he is not married yet is because there is something wrong with him. This flaw can be physical or not so noticeable, but evidently, it is there.

Example 2:
I don't have direct quotes, but I overheard this conversation today in the CougarEat. The girl was telling the guy about every date she had ever been on and whether or not she liked the date. I started listening in on the guy asking her, "So how do you feel about bowling dates?" To which she replied, "I have been on some good ones and some bad ones, it all depends." She then continued to break down the date and you could just see the guy taking mental notes. I hope he has a good memory and can read short hand because the girl was talking so fast even listening to her was a challenge. I, unfortunately, had to focus on my physics homework, but they continued to talk about dating for an hour, a whole hour. Well, I feel that I am getting off topic, but I am just going to go with the flow.

That last example led me to something that I hate to talk about and that is dating. At one point, the girl said something to effect of, "If I only got asked out on one date a year my self-esteem would be way down!" My question is, why does dating make you happy? Sure you may have a few good dates, get some free food and have a great time together. But in the end, you are left with the awkwardness of seeing an ex on campus or (gasp!) attending their wedding. Don't get me wrong, I am not saying anything at all about females not needing males, believe me, we need them. I just don't see why you need to be dating or in a relationship to be happy. I am at the time in my life where I am still figuring myself out and even I can see things that could be changed. Don't think I am bitter, either, because I assure you I am not. Dating is a great thing, but to always be dating to be happy, I just don't get. It seems to me that you need someone else to make you happy. I know that in my future I will (hopefully) fall head-over-heels in love with my eternal companion and in order for that to happen I need to date, but I will not dating to be happy or to have a larger self-esteem.

Okay, sorry for straying from the topic, but now that I have vented I feel much better. Well, there is a part of BYU campus for you. I have heard it called Marriageville as well as the Bunny Farm, you chose which one you like best. BYU is not all about dating and marriage, there is a little thing called getting an education that will be helpful for your future. But for those of you who are just working and are not in Provo, go ahead move here, and I am sure that there will be someone in the Utah Valley that will snag you. Of course, you also take the risk of being called "Wife-Hunter" or "Husband-Hunter" (thanks, Black Brothers).

New York Times Bestseller: The Ward Directory

As with every BYU single student ward, the most important publication to put out is the Ward Directory. The purpose of a Directory is to be able to contact those in your ward when you have need to. For example, get a hold of your home teachers, your FHE parents, the Relief Society secretary, your Visiting Teaching Supervisor, and most important of all, the Bishopric. The purpose of a BYU ward directory is somewhat different. I have heard it called, "The Ward Selectory", "The Menu," and my favorite, "The Meat (Meet?) Sheet". What is the point of including every one's picture, if not for dating purposes? This way, you don't have to call the entire opposite sex in your ward before you determine if you are compatible, you can just easily scratch off the ugly ones and only go for the good-looking ones. Many of these directories include their career (ie student, dentist, janitor) and what their major is if they are a student. This is to make your dating pool smaller by weeding out the stupid ones. For example, ladies, would you rather date a Mechanical Engineer that has no time for you now, but will certainly make money in the future? Or would you rather pursue an English major that can communicate well but will live in a box the rest of his life? Or gentleman, how about an MFHD major that will make a great wife and mother, or a physics major that will forever be smarter that you and can use relativity to her advantage? I understand that the questions were biased, but it is helpful to know these things. And lastly, all directories include hometown. That way, you can avoid dating someone that is from South Carolina when your from California. So when it comes marriage time, transportation costs are easier and you can move as far away from your in-laws as possible without moving to a different continent. Either that or you can just stay in Utah and avoid those awkward family reunions because I assure you, no one wants to vacation in Utah.

To sum it all up, I will tell you my recent BYU Ward Directory Activities. I filled out the paper that stated my hometown is Littleton, CO (far enough away from Utah), that my current job status is a student, and that my major was then undecided between Mechanical Engineering and Physics. The only thing left was my beautiful mug shot. A guy in my ward comes at 11PM on Thursday night with a camera. The problem? The photo shoot was scheduled without my knowledge and my evening was spent running and doing homework. Needless to say, I did not want everyone in the ward to think that I only "clean up nicely." I was told to email a picture the next day so that the Directory can be out on Sunday so the dating game can begin. Next problem - I had no good pictures unless they wanted one of me in my swimsuit or one where my face is have the area of the cross-section of a dime. Solution - I go to my BYU personal information page and send the picture that is on my BYU ID card. Yes, this picture was taken Freshman year (two years ago), but my hair is about the same length. At least it looks like me.

I know that come Sunday, I will search through that book feeling for inspiration. I just hope that it doesn't come in the way of inspiring me to run away as fast as possible.

Federer Wins - Again

I feel like I need to comment on the US Open. How can anyone be an avid tennis fan and not write about the outcome? As a true fan of the game, I will stick to the men's side. Federer beat Djokovic in a three set final. I still maintain that Federer is the best tennis player around, but my adoration with Djokovic is growing exponentially with every match I see him play. He shows a lot of emotion, but it really gets the fans involved. He lets you know when he is happy, when he is proud of himself, and when he is frustrated. Federer, on the other hand, makes everything look easy and doesn't show much of his feelings. He looked very scary in all black and had reason to be. I wanted it to be more of a match though. The first two sets were good with Djokovic having a total of about seven set points that Federer denied him with his #1 player in the world skill. How frustrating would that be? Seven set points and you were denied every single one? That put him down by two sets and the third (and final) was not as exciting. I still give Djokovic points for making it to the finals because he had never even made it to a semi-final of any Grand Slam tournament before (check my memory) and to lose to the #1 player in the final - nothing to really cry over, I am sure.

The First Week

It is Friday afternoon and I have just survived my first week of school. A new apartment, new classes, and new interests all added up to an overwhelming week.

I am taking multiple physics classes this semester and let me tell you, those physics nerds are hilarious! Notice how I don't include myself as a physics nerd, I am still trying to deny my true calling in life. I was in the Eyring Science Center today and could hear some guy going off on how cool Star Trek is. Forgive me if I am wrong, but Star Trek is just about the nerdiest show around. I will admit that I like the original episodes and that Spock is my favorite character, but my enjoyment of the show stops there. Well, I will also admit that I have looked up quotes from the show on imdb.com and have looked up plans for the Enterprise. I also happen to think that Galaxy Quest is hilarious for just making fun of the show. I do like my classes and the people in them. It is fun learning about how we describe the world and how not everything follows logic.

I am living with three new people this semester and they are great. I haven't gotten to know them as much as I would like, but my fears were put aside the second day I was there. They keep the apartment clean and neat and it has a nice feeling. A friend of mine makes his bed everyday and for a while there I could not understand why you would make your bed in the morning just to be unmade at night. It's like running on a treadmill - you aren't going anywhere! I have made my bed everyday for a week and it does make a difference. It is a nice feeling to get into a made bed after a long day. It also helps me make the transition from my daytime activities to my nighttime activities (sleep) better than getting into an unmade bed.

As far as my new interests go, well I will just say that I have gone running twice since I have been in Provo and have loved it. I was never a runner before and only ran when people where chasing me. That all changed when I ran with two ladies at work one day and signed up for a 5K. I ran that 5K (well almost the whole way) and loved it. My stepmom helped to inspire me - she is an amazing runner. She convinced my dad to buy me running shoes and let me run with the dog. I have been hooked ever since. I am still trying to get over the first hurdle and then I am hoping that I can continue to improve. I will tell you that I miss that dog, though. She was the best running partner I have had!

Saturday is a Special Day

Yesterday was my last Saturday in Denver before I head back to school. What did I do yesterday? I went to IHOP for breakfast, had the Strawberry French Toast that felt like I was eating dessert and then I went home and took a nap. Exciting right? I wake up from my nap slightly groggy and have a sudden urge to go to Elitches. My younger brother and sister leave 10 minutes later and I cannot help but wonder, "I am scared to death of roller coasters. Why am I going?" The fear was all for naught, however, because I did not get too scared. Even on the Boomerang, where the first time I rode it, I cried. Remember that Tyler? What made it even better was that I sat next to a stranger and had to keep my composure. I wouldn't want the "Bikini Patrol" to have to practice CPR on me. We had a great time waiting in line. I was really happy to be hanging out with my siblings before I leave them for four months. I don't know who is happier about that last little tidbit, me or my parents. I can tell you that my dad is most likely counting down the days and has been since June. I believe that I have caused his hair to gray more in the past few months than all of his other children combined. I should probably watch out, however, because as he has told me time and time before, "I brought you into this world, I can take you out." I am sad to be leaving, but after having spent so much time on my own, the family setting can get a little annoying. No offense family, you are great, I am just enjoying being selfish for a while, it comes with the age.

Humiliation!

Last night, to my astonishment, I lost a tennis match 6-1,6-2. Why is this such a big deal you ask? Well, I was beat by a Utard that has only played for two years. I have played for almost my whole life. You know what makes it even worse? We put a wager on it, that in the end he provided the ice cream instead of me. Can I even keep one shred of dignity?

Despite the fact that I lost horribly and completely, I still had a great time. Talked some smack, tried to keep my temper under control, and didn't even swear once. My racket did find its way to ground once, however, but I don't think he saw that. Why is it that when I play someone who just happened to pick up the sport always beats me? It has happened multiple times before and will most likely continue to happen for years to come. Another source of frustration is that he wasn't even a pretty tennis player. His form was all for naught and his serve kicked butt when it was in. What were all those lessons for? To look good when I lose? I will add that I thought I looked good in my favorite skirt.

I really did have a great time. It was nice to get out there and hit the ball with a good looking gentleman. It's not every day that I play with someone better looking than myself.

Wednesday Night Catch-Up

I was sick the other day and actually spent the whole day in my spider-infested bed. It seemed a little childish that I would still not sleep in there after the sheets are watched and no spider had been seem for weeks. Sadly, that did not carry over into the night. I ended up moving back upstairs at midnight because I couldn't sleep. A result of my arachnophobia or of the now uncomfortable bed? You tell me.

I received an email today relating the fact that females really do prefer pink more than males. They said that it could be a result of the different genes, but I remain skeptical. I think that males prefer the pinkless colors because they are afraid that they will appear to feminine and that people will start suspecting them of different orientation. I say, go with whatever feels comfortable. My favorite color is pink because I wanted to make my little sister angry. Now it is some sort of a neurological disorder called "pinkattractinitis". I only have one question, why do all the fashion critics think that every girl grows out of liking pink at the age of ten? Why not 20 or better yet, 30? I went shopping tonight (gasp, I broke down) and wanted to shop in the girls department because there was more pink. If only I were a bit more petite. Okay, enough complaining.

I have one more week of work. I am sure that my coworkers are counting down the days until the pink intern leaves. I am sad to be leaving work, however. I love where I work and I love the people. It has been nice to be on the younger side of things. As Caryl told me today, "We live vicariously through you." Though that was only in reference to a hot guy. I like to think it is true.

The "Incident"

The "incident" happened a couple of weeks ago and I have been dealing with the consequences ever since. So here is a telling:

Since my room is in the basement, it has been a choice spot for spiders. I had gotten to know them pretty well and had no problem killing them (at least the small ones). One night, I killed two spiders before I went to bed and was sort of nervous until I fell asleep. At about 2:30 I woke up and went to the bathroom. I got back to my room where I proceeded to kill three spiders. I start to get back in bed and I see a spider run across the foot of my bed. I jump out of bed and fold my arms across my pounding heart. I was unsure of how big the spider was, I was only able to catch a glimpse of the color - brown. I start moving my sheets and the spider runs right under my sheets. This time I could see more details. He was big, and brown, but the important things was that he was big. There I am standing next to my bed on one foot folding my arms and I just start to cry. I stand there for five minutes crying before I realise that distance would probably help. I sit upstairs at my kitchen table where Icontinue crying for about 20 more minutes. By this time, it is two thirty and my senses start to come back to me. i realize that I should go upstairs and sleep in the extra bed. Unfortunately, I have to make about three trips back to my room because kept forgetting things. It took me another hour and a half to finally go back to sleep, and even then all I could ever think about was the movie "The Covenant."

For the following few days, I spent as little time as possible in my room and never touched my bed. I slowly adapted to the idea of a spider living in my bed and it didn't bother me too much. Unfortunately, I suffered a relapse of my arachniphobia and am now scared to death of the little things. Since then, I have lived through finding a spider in the lab and the teasing following the event the ended up with me on the counter and my hands folded for the rest of the day. I have also had another incident where a spider crawled on my and I cried again. And lastly, I was able to run up the stairs after I discovered one on a step.

After all of this, my dad finally decided to spray for spiders and give me some spray that will kill them on contact (one can only hope). I have had thoughts like, "I am a hundred times bigger that that spider, why did I run away?" I usually follow those thought up with, "Yeah, we should get some cake from Hacienda Colorado."

Winning Wimbledon

I feel like I need to catch up with Wimbledon. Whatever is written here, I still maintain that Roger Federer is my favorite tennis player ever.

Starting with the woman's side, I was very happy to see that Venus crushed Maria Sharapova and that she went on to win the championship. I was sad to see Justine Henin lose, it is not something that happens on a regular basis. She lost to Marion Bartoli, who hits every shot two-handed. This is a weird concept for me to accept. It seems as if someone would need really long arms to hit a two-handed forehand. However, I do hit a two-handed backhand, so nothing is impossible. Again, way to go Venus.

With the men's side, I have many comments to make. First, Federer received a fourth round bye. My sister did not like this turn of events, she believes that he should be the last person to receive a bye. My thoughts are quite the opposite, if anyone is going to receive a bye it should be the best player in the tournament, right? Second, Nadal has breezed his way into the finals and his semi-finalist opponent had to withdraw because of injuries. He is the only player to threaten Federer's Wimbledon-winning streak. Federer is going for five straight wins, no easy feat. Third, my ultimate favorite match was between Richard Gasquet and Andy Roddick. Gasquet won 4-6, 4-6, 7-6, 7-6, 8-6. He had something like 60 or 70 winners. This guy can hit a winner of a shot he has to run all the way across the court to get. That just amazes me, he is such a pretty tennis player. I am sad that the poster boy of tennis lost in the quarterfinals, but all he could do was watch those amazing shots hit the line every time.

Well, when all is said and done, I am hoping that Federer remains the best and that he wins tomorrow. I won't go as far as to say I will pray for him, but I am glad that I don't have church until 12:30, hopefully after the match.

On Aunts and Robots

Yesterday was a very exciting day, two things happened. I became an aunt to a beautiful baby girl and I saw the movie Transformers. The baby was born yesterday at about noon Texas time and she quickly became the topic of every discussion after that. I was very excited until I realized that no one wanted to talk about me any more. Not that I always enjoyed being talked about, but why is this little baby girl getting all the attention? It's not as if she can really enjoy it already. Despite the fact that I am currently not being discussed in close circles, it is okay. Every person deserves their moment, even if it happens within the first 24 hours of being born. The baby girl, however, deserves to be the center of attention because she was born with open spina bifida. She had to go into surgery today to close the whole in her back. The prognosis is very good and despite that fact, she is a healthy baby girl. I am just glad that I don't have to babysit until the baby gets to be about one, when she becomes fun.

On a different note, I saw Transformers yesterday. That movie was awesome. It included violence, comedy, and robots, what could be better? Call me a nerd, but those make the best kinds of movies. Not to mention the fact that Shia LaBeouf has turned into quite the handsome young man.

Spiders!

For the past couple of days, I have not been able to rid myself of spiders. These are not imaginary spiders; they are the real thing – with eight legs, an arachnid. Monday before work I spot one above my closet and had to let it be because my dad had already left for work and being 5’2”, I could not reach it (not that I really wanted too). Luckily, it was still there (at least I think it was the same one!) after work and my dad was able to kill it effectively. About an hour later when I was running out the door to go to FHE, there was another spider. This one was bigger and also too high on the wall for me to reach. I calmly let my dad know it was there and he told me to wait. I go to FHE and come back to a spider still on my wall. My dad was nice enough to come downstairs before we went to bed to kill it. Needless to say, my night was a little restless and m y skin never stopped itching.

The very next day (Tuesday), I hear a scream in the lab and look over to see Mitch jump out of his chair. This was not a girly scream, it was a manly scream coming from a 6’ guy with very big muscles and size 14 shoe. It turns out that this big guy is afraid of spiders – he had seen one on the ground. This spider was a good size and met his death while being sprayed with alcohol. It made for a funny picture – watching Mitch run away from a spider. After the spider dies, Norbert picks it up and puts it in the bag. He shoes the bag to me and I jump out of my chair. He says, “It’s dead, Carly, in a bag. This tiny spider can’t hurt you.” To which I reply, “I am not talking to you Norbert.” This sparks many conversations where I make fun of him for being afraid of flying and he makes fun of me for having arachnophobia.

Not ten minutes later, I find myself in the bathroom and see a big spider on the wall. It starts moving and falls off the wall. Since I do not dare venture closer and the floor is dark, I wash my hands and make a (very) hasty retreat. I tell Norbert this and he tells me that I need to take care of it. The spider control at Baxa is made up of myself and Mitch (I think he was lying). About 3 hours later I find myself in the restroom again and slowly open the door saying, “Is it safe?”. Caryl, Katie, and Kristi, and Megan are changing in the bathroom thinking that I was talking about them. I tell them about my earlier adventures and they don’t seem concerned at all, maybe I do go a bit over the top.

That night, I return to my lovely bedroom with lots of pink on the wall and come in contact with another spider. This one is of medium size and so I bravely grab 15 Kleenexes and proceed to kill the spider. I am victorious! The spider is dead, in the Kleenex and I am not running around all squirmy. Needless to say, I tell Norbert this the next day and he congratulates me and tells me that I need to keep this up. After all of the progress that I have made, I am still very afraid of spiders and get all itchy just thinking about them. The two scariest movies are Arachnophobia and The Covenant (only because of the scary spider dream).

Pink and McDreamy

Today was a crazy day. The only pink that I wore was on my fingernails, my toenails and on my wrist. When this happens, I get remarks such as, “Carly, you’re not wearing pink!” (I think that I would have noticed my lack of pink in the morning) or “Where’s the pink, Carly?”. My favorites include, “You must be sick, Carly, you’re not wearing any pink” or “Carly, are you insane? Where is the pink?” Correct me if I am wrong, but would one be considered insane if they wore pink everyday rather than the opposite? It should be a sign of sanity when I don’t wear pink. I was also told today that it is only okay for girls under the age of nine to wear pink. My response to this was that I am short.

They moved my desk today. I sent a couple on evil glares toward Caryl, but then I got over it. Many people commented on my move. Marisol said that she was surprised to see McDreamy on the wall of a cubicle and then realized that it belonged to me. Josh asked me why they moved me over here, to which I responded, “They didn’t like me over there.” He replied with, “What made them think that it would be any different over here?” (cue the sad face) “I am going to have to go to the top on this one.” This is the treatment that I get at work; I guess they appreciate all the humor I provide for them. Even if it in referring to my body (in the most modest way).

Bye, Bye Cavs

Okay, for all those NBA Finals fans, aka my brother-in-law – San Antonio beat Cleveland last night. It was game two and the Spurs had already won the first game. The Cavaliers were down by 28 points at half time and rallied back to only lose by 11. This reminds me slightly of a certain intramural basketball team at BYU that lost by about 50 points almost every game. Try as they might, they could just not beat other teams. We had this ritual where I would make Chocolate Pudding Cake if they lost and Italian Crème Cake if the other team forfeited. We were never able to define a winner cake. Still have to give them points (Weight Watchers points) for trying right?

A Mournful Loss

Rafael Nadal and Roger Federer battled it out today for the final of the French Open. I am a fan of Federer; he is such a pretty tennis player and makes every shot look easy. Nadal is also a pretty tennis player and has dominated on clay for a while. He beat Federer last year in the French and followed it up this year beating Federer in four sets. Norbert and I argue at work whether or not Federer is still going to be at the top. I say he is, it is just the French that he can’t win and Norbert claims that he is too old to stay at the top for much longer. There was another let down this year in the French, Andy Roddick lost in the first round. The French is generally a funny tournament because it is played on clay and the top players can go without winning the French at all. Still, I think he could have done better than the first round. It seems like he is turning into the poster boy of tennis, much like Anna Kournikova.

Length of a Carly

There is a new SI unit of length here at work. It is a “Carly”, which measure 5’ 1 ¾ “ exactly. The new unit of measure was discovered when Harvey was describing the new bag machine to go into the clean room. It is about 54’ long and I said, “That is like 10 of me!” Gary, who was sitting close by, made the executive decision to make it an SI unit. Gary is about 120% of a Carly and Holly is 95% of a Carly. To top it all off, they are coming up with a pink measuring tape exactly 1 Carly long used to measure things.

Goodnight Moon

I have slept very little the past couple of nights. This is due to the fact that I go to bed later than I should and that my mind never likes to stop, so it has been a hard battle trying to stay awake. In fact, yesterday, Norbert had to wake me up (I wasn’t really asleep, just out for a while). So, it came as a surprise this morning when I magically turn hyper at 7:45 AM. I chose not to dry my hair this morning, so it didn’t look very good and my makeup looked worse today as well. I walk into work and say “hi” to people and start telling everybody that I didn’t dry my hair that morning so it looks like crap. Megan mentions that I am very happy for a Thursday, which is a little out of the norm because Grey’s Anatomy will not be new for another three months. Josh and Mark also mention that I am very happy for this early in the morning. I tell them that they are both wearing green (which is true) and that I have exactly zero green shirts. They reply with, “I have zero pink shirts,” which I imagine is a good thing. They tease me some more when I am trying to balance scales (kind of like a lever) that are about shoulder height. Even with the added height on my shoes, I still have to stand on my tiptoes. Sadly, as the day went on, my lack of sleep caught up to me and being hyper has changed a feeling of great fatigue.

Trouble?

I came to a realization this morning. Multiple people ask me if I am staying out of trouble; to which I replay with ether, “Trying to, but it is hard” or “Nope”. I am not sure why they ask me that, I mean I do what I am told and I do it right – unless I do it wrong. The only trouble I have ever gotten into happened at home and was dealt with using my parents as the punishers. I was a good girl in school; the only time I went to the Principal’s office was to receive a reward. Alas, it is most likely just a jest, I am sure that they are making fun of me somehow, and I will make it my life’s mission to find out what. That is only because my life right now is work, work, work and it will end in September when I go back to school. Thinking about it now, there was no realization, just confusion. More and more confusion to add to my already confusing life. Not really, my life is actually pretty simple at the moment.

Baby Got Back

My sister is going to have a baby girl in about a month. Let’s just say that I am glad she resides in Texas so that I don’t have to hold the baby. You can quote me, “I am not a fan of babies”. Tis true yet, I have this happy little feeling in the bottom of my heart, the fact that I am going to be an aunt. Despite the vision I get from the movie Alien (where the alien pops out of the guys chest) that keeps playing in my head, I have a feeling that her baby will resemble a human, however faintly. My sister happens to be a very petite, very skinny pregnant lady. It was only after I saw a special on TLC where this paralyzed lady (from the waist down) gave birth to a healthy baby boy that I finally believed that my sister could have her baby.

Case of the Mondays?

So I went for a walk today during lunch. Being a college student, my walking gear included the pink shirt I wore to work along with my black capris, and flip flops. Tennis shoes are optional when you have just painted your toenails and when you have walked around Elitches in sandals. Who needs tennis shoes? Despite the fact that I have super flat feet that are making my back go all wack and possibly causes my shin splints, flip flops still remain my shoe of choice. Who wants to trap their feet when they can be free and everyone can see your new nail polish. As a prize for going on the walk, I received socks with our company logo on them. The only problem is that the socks look like they were made for Bigfoot or the Hulk. My feet are size 7.5 and these socks are seriously huge.

After my walk, I ate lunch with Caryl and Megan. Megan told me that my dad hugged her in a meeting once, as a joke. I asked her if she had said that socks with sandals are cool. She burst out laughing. I do imagine that my dad would hug someone that thought socks with sandals were cool; all he gets from me is constant teasing. To paraphrase Jim from the office: I wanted to apologize for all the pranks I pulled on him, and then he opened his mouth. I wonder how hard it would be to get his room key.

My younger brother has remained relentless with the short jokes. The other day he called, “Carly, where are you?” to which I replied “Here!” (like a dutiful student). Both he and my sister start looking closely at the carpet and say, “Carly, Carly, where are you. I can’t see you. Can you here me? Need help navigating that jungle down there?” Keep in mind that I am not that short and that my brother is currently shorter than me.

We had FHE tonight and I went with some people that I don’t know very well. The guy that drove had this nice sports car that just speaks “speed.” The funny thing was that he would speed up super, super fast and then go the speed limit. Correct me if I am wrong, but sports cars are meant to go fast (-er than the speed limit). We visited a family in his ward that I had never met. They asked me my name and once they heard it, I knew, I just knew that they know my dad. For those that don’t know how far my dad’s popularity stretches, I have had plenty of people tell me that I am his daughter. As if I hadn’t figured that out already.

Is it Hot in Here?

As most of you know, the Cavaliers beat the Pistons on Saturday night to advance to the NBA Finals. As one who only follows basketball because of a certain brother-in-law and to talk sports at work, I have never heard of the Cavs. The only teams that I knew were the Detroit Pistons, the San Antonio Spurs, the Denver Nuggets and the Miami Heat. What kind of a name is Heat anyway? The Heat are coming, ohh boy, better drink your ice water. Oh by the way, did you put sunscreen on? And is it a dry heat or do they come with the much dreaded humidity? Of course, the Pistons aren’t much better. Why not name them the Clutch or the Intake Valve? Anyway, the Finals start on Thursday, I will not be sitting on my couch watching. However, I will find out the result from a certain brother-in-law or the very exciting internet.

Feed-n-Flirt

At church yesterday, the ladies bathroom was “broken”. Unfortunately at the Belleview building there happens to only be one ladies restroom. One would not think this would be a problem, but “one” must be from the male population. Putting a bunch of ladies in a building together for 3+ hours without a bathroom is a death wish. There was Priesthood holder standing guard in front of the Men’s room, but we ladies know to not venture in there, even if relief is needed. Needless to say, I found a woman’s bathroom close by that was still “in service”.
We also had “Chat-n-Snack” afterwards (on a Fast Sunday!). For those unfamiliar with “Chat-n-Snack”, let me explain. It is a ritual commonly used in Young Singles Adult wards all over the world. The purpose of the “Feed-n-Flirt” (Chat-n-Snack) is to allow members of the opposite gender get to know each other, obtain a few dates, and ultimately get married. What Mormon couple doesn’t want to say they met at BYU or at “Feed-n-Flirt”? Besides the whole, “date, date, date, get married” thing, I really do like my YSA ward.

Just Me and My "Friends"

Okay, to respond to your comment: My swimsuit is actually black, but the shorts and sandals are both pink. Oh and no, my legs do not dangle when I sit on a dime. :)

Last night was a night full of adventures. Well, just one really. My bedroom is located in the basement and the window is in a window well. The screen does not fully connect to the edge of the window and when it rains, spiders find sanctuary in my room. I am no fan of spiders; in fact they scare me to pieces. If you have seen The Covenant, this is repetitive, but this girl has a dream where she wakes up and finds a spider in her bed. Then there are multiple spiders, and then the spiders are covering her room (I am getting goose bumps just typing this). Then the spiders start to crawl under her skin – while watching this I felt like they were all over me. I have had that same dream multiple times (before and after the movie). My dad calls spiders my “friends” and makes fun of me whenever I ask him to come and kill one for me. Okay, long introduction to a short story. I see a spider in my room and decide to kill it. Here are my thoughts at the time:

“Okay, Carly, you can do this. Just get 5,000 tissues to protect yourself. All you have to do is pounce and squeeze the spider to kill it. Okay, here it goes. Oh no! The spider moved right before I got it! Now it is coming towards me, ready to kill me (my heart is beating very, very fast right about now). Grab the tissue and try again. Okay, got it that time. Make sure it is dead. It is. Run and put the tissue in a trash can far, far way. Now that the tissue is gone, squirm and shake all the remaining spiders off. Now check your bed for spiders, get in bad, and pull the covers tight so that none can get you. Carly, you are one childish girl.”

Ahh yes, the feeling of accomplishment.

We had an intern meeting this morning and talked about work for maybe 15% of the time. The rest we talked about World of Warcraft and how everyone likes to make fun of the interns. Snacks included are: Cheezits, Mint Milano Cookies, and Diet Coke (the latter two were at my request). I see Nichole right after the meeting and she asks me how it was. My reply, “We had Diet Coke and Mint Milano Cookies, my life is fulfilled.” Of course, that would be a very sad life if that were really true.

Random Fact: Spectrophotometer - an instrument for making photometric comparisons between parts of spectra. (Dictionary.com)

Here is a conversation I had with Josh, a guy from work:
Josh: What’s going on Carly?
Me: Oh just running this test.
Josh: Well, you better hurry if you are going to catch the running test.
Me: Thanks Josh, but I don’t think it will work. I have short legs.
Josh: Mitch will help. He’s a fast runner.
Mitch (Another guy, very tall, very built): What will I do?
Yeah, seems retarded now, but at the time it was funny.

First Thoughts

I am currently interning at a medical device company, hence the name, “Short Pink Intern”. It is here where I am constantly reminded of my height and how odd it is that I wear pink everyday. I am not that short, just shy of 5’2”, however, whenever I can’t reach anything, then I am bombarded with a bundle of short jokes. My favorites came very recently: My younger brother now only calls me “Lord Farquad” (the king from Shrek) and my friend recently told me, “You are so afraid of heights that you didn’t grow very tall.” Oddly enough, the best jokes come from my younger brother who happens to be 10 and shorter than me.

My favorite color is pink and has been for about 4 years now. I don’t really remember how it started; all I know is that now everything I own has to be pink (within reason, of course). I have been told that I am attracted to pink, like to north end of a magnet to the south end of another magnet. I cannot deny this, because after that comment was made, I immediately ran to something that was pink that I was in no need of; however, I still felt the need to get a closer look.

I am currently living with my dad and I feel sorry for him. He has to put of with me and everything that I make fun of him for. For example, there is his “cool” car – the station wagon that just screams “I am old and have no taste whatsoever!” Or the fact that he thinks that it is cool to wear socks with sandals; I don’t know much about fashion, but I do know that that combination is one to stay far, far away from.

I went for a walk around my building today because my mind had shut off. Usually about every afternoon I have to jump start my mind again. This is accomplished in one of three ways: 1. Drilling a hole in my head and pressing the “START” button (however, this plan fails because we have safety rules at work and drilling through your skull to restart your brain falls under one of the “DO NOT’s”). 2. Walking around the building – this restarts my brain, but the batteries run out a short time later. This can also fail when it is cloudy outside and raining, like it was today. 3. Diet Coke or simple caffeine. This has the longest-lasting effect, maybe because I am still not fully thinking of my work, but boy do I feel GREAT! If all three happen to fail, the only thing left to do is go around talking to people while eating chocolate taken off of Chad’s desk.